Ever had one of those times in your life where things just fall apart? It has been like that in our adventure with our home on Bel Aire for quiet a while now. Just when I’m ready for a break, the latest thing that happens is…our windows; the installation of them. It has yet to happen. It’s going on four months. So for the second time, I had upended our home to move everything for installation of the windows, and it didn’t happen…again. So now nine of the twelve windows had to be re-ordered because they were measured incorrectly. They are hoping to have them in by Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving!!! We have no idea exactly when that might happen. Hubby seems to want to give them the chances. So everything is a mess and not put away, and….just not fun. Oh yah…on top of that, our refi has been delayed now for months and should have been done by July. We have decided to use a different office and that means starting all over.
So am I happy? Am I feeling a happy dance coming on???? Uh…no. In fact, I have had a hard time dealing with it all. It is so disappointing. I feel kind of down in the dumps. We have had to make decisions about the windows, as well as, choose to refi through another office. So we are still in a holding pattern with hopes that we WILL move ahead.
That is the key…keep moving ahead. Let me use the window above to illustrate a point. This window above reminds me that I can choose how I look at it. I can choose to see only the wall behind it. OR, I can choose to add something enjoyable to the view by adding the figurine on the shelf, and/or put in a photo that will give me a total different view through my window. I decided that I am going to choose to look through my window and see the view going forward instead. That means I looked forward to a friend who is came to visit. I planned for a fun few days with her to bring her joy. We had a total blast! I did the very things that bring me, and that of my friend, joy. We did some shopping and I found a couple of good finds for the house. I had an early morning delicious chocolate croissant at a bakery in Seabrook. I enjoyed a wonderful lunch and conversation by the ocean with her. I took pictures. I drove The Captain; even down on the beach. Today, after all that is over, I continue to work on it. I will persevere, and it may take me a few days, but I will move forward.
Why? Because God knows the end from the beginning. To stay in the dumps means I don’t trust God enough to turn this around, or to use it for my good. Did I pray about it? Not like I should have. I know we will have troubles. I am no different from anyone else in the trouble department. However, I CAN choose to have a different view. I know what that means. I also know that God wants me to trust Him with everything. Not pieces of me, or certain places of my heart. He wants me to trust Him with it ALL.
So I will keep designing my life to have meaning by enjoying the things each day that bring me joy! I will put some hot water into my sweet tea-pot that is one of my finds, and enjoy some chamomile tea, and start my gratitude hearts dropping in my jar. (It had kind of went on the back burner the last month or so.) I do that because I know by experience, that is what works for me. I also know that taking those steps changes my focus from me to Him, and that is what will honor God the most.
Look beyond the blank wall to see the beauty through the window. It’s there if you look. Imagine this window is your life. What do you see? Is the wall blank? Is the window too smudged with the daily grind to see beauty anymore? Don’t be afraid to admit you don’t always have it together. What you are experiencing may be just what someone else needs to hear. I trust that is so for you today as you read this.
Walking the journey with you…