My Patience Went Out The Door

Ever have one of those days where you get a BIG revelation about yourself, and don’t like what you learn?  A clear glance in the mirror?

I learned yesterday is that I am not as patient as I like to think I am.  I came in with my hubby to the hospital for a procedure that was to start at 1:30 pm, and he didn’t go in until 4:30 pm.  I was good with the first 30-45 minutes or even an hour, but after that, I had less and less tolerance for that kind of scheduling.  I mean really?  3 hours?  Someone might want to schedule the surgeries a bit better.  After almost 2.5 hours, I asked,  “Do we get a waiting discount for our time wasted?”  She told me that the Dr. doesn’t work that way and doesn’t like waiting for his next patient.  I said, “Yes, that is too bad.  It should only be inconvenient for the patient.”  I’m thinking about us paying exorbitant prices for the procedure that we wait 3 hours to get.  Our time is of no value?  We came in at 12:30 pm as we were told to, so that we could check in and then have surgery at 1:30 pm.  So we get to hang around for 4 yours today?  Lovely…  Craziness!

So even though I like to think I can roll with the punches, it seems I don’t do that so well sometimes.  I’m kind of more of the type of person that if you tell me to be here at a certain time and or do a certain thing, then I am going to be there on time, and do what I said.  My time is valuable, and I respect someone else’s time schedule also. Understanding that sometimes a surgery has complications… I get that.  But to be 3 hours behind schedule?  That just seems like you schedule too many in a day.  So… it would seem, that I am not as much of a “go with the flow” kind of person as I thought I was yet.  But I also remember the day when I would let others treat me without consideration also, and I would let it go and be mad later.  I don’t do that anymore.  I say something, polite possibly, but I think they get my drift.  I AM quick to tell others when they do a good job, however.  I have also learned that you have to advocate for yourself, or someone else, or you get ignored in those settings.  Let’s just say I wasn’t feeling like going home and dropping hearts in my Gratitude Jar.

Add to that, he couldn’t complete the surgical procedure as planned because of complications.  So now we will have to have another surgery and pay for it twice, because said same surgeon thought that his last attack was no big deal and he could wait almost two weeks to get it taken care of.  He said

himself after this surgical procedure that he should have done it when he was in his office last.  I’m like, “Yep!  That’s what I thought.  So now we will GET to have two surgeries to pay for instead of one.”  I wasn’t embracing my day.

The point of this confession is this:

Irritating as it is, what was found from this procedure was not good, and would have been worse if the procedure hadn’t been done.  My hubby’s kidney had stopped working because of the stone blocking the opening.  The stone had flipped sideways and adhered snuggly to the wall of the kidney and opening.  It could have done some real damage had we not found out that it wasn’t working.  This surgery revealed this issue, and the surgeon was able to manipulate the stone enough to get the kidney working again.  He could not blast the stone due to its proximity to the wall of the kidney.  Because of the trauma to the kidney, it now has to have time to heal before the next surgery can be done.  So… with all the impatience that I experienced on an empty stomach with nothing to drink, is immeasurably small compared to a kidney that stopped working.

God knows the beginning from the end.  He shows His love to us in many ways, and today was one of them.  Terry was feeling good and really didn’t want to have this surgery.  I said nope, you need to do this.  God knew what was going on in there and that he would need to take care of it. He also reminded me that the nurses don’t have anything to do with scheduling and they are just trying to their job.  Dealing with a grouchy lady that has been sitting in an uncomfortable chair for 3 hours with nothing to eat or drink (because I didn’t want to leave hubby there alone) isn’t fun for them either.  Now I wasn’t obnoxious in my dealings by any means, but just enough so they knew I wasn’t pleased.  Still not the best way to show Jesus, ya think?  So…I stand corrected in the patience department…I DO have a great deal of improvement to make.  God in all His gentleness just reminded me.

However, I don’t pray for it.  We know what can happen there!  But I do ask for God’s revelation in my life.  I have been made aware of the area of patience yesterday, and will make a valiant effort to be more understanding.  So from my desk to you, I encourage you to ask God what you might need to brush up on that will make you more available to share a life that looks like Jesus.  I do that often, and He was more than happy to show me as He did at the hospital.

We don’t get by with much when we are asking Him to change us to look more like Him.  Until my next hospital visit the beginning of August, where I’m sure I will get to try that again!  I better go drop some hearts in to my Gratitude Jar.

Until next time…

~JoAnn